When Things Fall Apart - sermon Feb. 1

 “When Things Fall Apart”

Rev. Alison Longstaff, February 1^st, 2014

Bath Church of the New Jerusalem

Ezekiel 37: 1-14; John 11:portions of 1-45; Apocalypse Explained 555:14

           

"Mortal, can these bones live?" I said, "O Sovereign Lord, you alone know."  Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!  And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone. I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on them and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them. Then he said to me, "Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, mortal, and say to it, 'This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.'" So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army.

 

Bones and flesh and breath. We are more than our bones. Our bones are our ideas, and they are the truths we need in order to live an “upright” life. They are the things we all know . . . but can fail to live. A “truth” is a dry bone when we know it, but we don’t live by it yet.

The thing is, it is hard for us to make dry bones live without the help of God—some might say, impossible. Look at the alcoholic who knows he or she shouldn't drink, but can’t seem to stop.

"Mortal, can these bones live?" says God to Ezekiel.  And Ezekiel says, "O Sovereign Lord, you alone know."

Put yourself in Ezekiel’s shoes. Staring at a valley full of dry bones, how would you answer God? Perhaps Ezekiel was hedging his bets with his response. “God alone knows,” he said. Was he being sarcastic? Or reverential? Despairing? Or perhaps, skeptical? Was this his way of saying, “I’m not going to touch that one….”? 

But God can look at a valley of dead dreams and wasted efforts, and make them live again. And when God asks us if we think the bones can live, “He” makes space for all of our responses, whether we are in the optimistic and shiny faith of the newly spiritual-born, or the jaded and weary faith of the long-lived spiritual traveler. Depending on who we are and what we have been through, we may be jaded, or hopeful, bitter, or deeply trusting, or a mix.

Bones need flesh to live—flesh that softens and rounds and pulls things together—flesh that can pull these dry bones into a human form, capable of hugging, lifting, carrying, serving, holding, and bandaging the wounded. Flesh corresponds to love. Flesh symbolizes putting things to use. “Fleshing out” a belief is when we try to live it. 

I like to think of myself as environmentally conscious, but how much do I actually do on a daily basis to help the environment? Do I recycle diligently? Do I walk when possible, rather than drive? Do I compost? Do I support businesses that have proactive environmental practices?  This is a fairly civic and world-bound illustration, but you can extrapolate over to any value that you desire to embody—be it devoting more time to your relationships, to being trustworthy in your workplace, to working out more often and eating better, to being kinder to that one person that absolutely drives us up the wall.

Getting such “bones” fleshed out isn't as easy as we wish it was. Living our beliefs is where the “rubber hits the road,” and sometimes our efforts can feel pretty dead and lifeless.  I know mine seem to need constant “resurrection” or re-commitment, like any New Year’s resolutions that died within a few weeks of their launch.

This piece of Scripture, like every other passage in God’s Word, has layer upon layer of meaning.  We can study it from all sorts of angles and find new, fascinating, and nourishing insights. And like we discussed in the children’s talk, the ideas we find are never meant to be used to whack our brothers and sisters over the head with, though this does tend to be what we do, at least at first, with God’s truths. This passage is for me to use in my life, and you to use in your life, not for me or you to use to find fault with someone else’s life.

So what is this passage primarily about?  Is it a confirmation that living our faith can sometimes be hard work? Oh, this passage goes way beyond that. This passage is about the despair we feel when we have tried and tried to live a better way, and have failed.

           

This story describes the death of living dreams. There is a saying that goes, “A person can survive up to forty days without food, three days without water, but scarcely a minute without hope.” This level of discouragement is absolute.  We are ready to throw in the towel.  No doubt all of us here have experienced this despair to some degree, but this despair is well beyond the loss of hope and deep into bitterness and anguish. This despair is what Jesus was feeling when he cried out from the cross, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?”  God is the only hope left, and God doesn't seem to be doing anything to help us.

At the time of this story the people of Israel had been captive in Babylon for over a generation.  They had been torn from their burning homes and possessions, had seen their children dragged off to be slaves, their leaders and warriors had been murdered, and their great and beautiful temple being torched and demolished. They had been marched hundreds of miles from their homeland to be slaves in an alien land. This was not even a fresh reality. By the time Ezekiel was prophesying to them, they were in their second generation of slavery in Babylon, and their children had no sense of identity other than as slaves—no experience of their homeland. They could see no way out, and no way to rebuild. Sorrow upon sorrow. Loss upon loss.

It is important to understand that the Judaic people had then and continue to have a profound sense of “place” as an important part of their identity as a worshiping nation. Christians do not have this as part of our religious narrative, so we can have a hard time understanding it. “Where two or three are gathered” is where we can worship, no matter where that is. But for this people, the “Holy Land,” and particularly the city of Jerusalem is a part of their flesh-and-bones sense of religious place, and without living there and worshiping there, they do not feel that they are being God’s people the way they ought to be. Before you snort at this idea, realize that you and I all have within us attachments to certain ideas of how things need to be for us to be right in God’s eyes, beyond which we cannot see. We too have attachments to ideas that might look silly to someone else. We are not so different.

And if it is in God’s Word, it is in our story too. You and I may never be carried away captive from our physical homelands. But we can and will know the equivalent depth of despair in our spiritual lives. When we are at this level of spiritual despair, it is as in the story of Lazarus—by the time Jesus arrives, all hope of rescue is long gone.  

Was Martha feeling bitter when she says, “If you had been here, my brother would not have died,”?  Did she feel abandoned? She had expected Jesus to save the day, and He hadn't shown up in time. This is the cry of every person of faith when we bang into the hideous unfairnesses in life from which we think we should have been spared. But we are not spared. Lazarus did die and lay dead four days. 

When things go horribly wrong, especially with those who have lived good and honorable lives, we can feel betrayed by God. It is a mark of the deepest despair when we feel so abandoned by God that we question God’s existence. If you hit this level of spiritual struggle you are not “weak” in your faith.  You might even be at an advanced level of spiritual work.  Severe doubt is a very real part of developing a living, breathing, resilient faith.  Mother Teresa struggled with terrible doubt in God’s existence her whole ministry.  C.S. Lewis spent many years as an atheist. The current Archbishop of Canterbury and even Pope Francis struggle with doubt in God’s existence and benevolence. Even Jesus cried out, “Why have you abandoned me?” Doubting God’s presence and loving care is normal, and you are in good company if you go there.  

           

Remember, if it is in God’s Word, it is describing a phase of our spiritual journey. No part is “wrong.” It just is. This story is about a very hard part of the journey, and yet it is full of compassion and hope.

So there we are, staring at the dead and dry bones of our hopes, our dreams, and even our faith.  God leads us around and around the bones. They are very many—piles of them! And they are very dead.  And God says to us as we stare at the ruins of all that was meant to be, "Mortal, can these bones live?"

Well, if it was me, I’d say with deep sarcasm, “Oh sure they can.” Ezekiel says, "O Sovereign Lord, you alone know," which could also be heard as, “You know God, if anyone can do it, You can.”

Remember, this isn't just a curious story from an ancient text. Put yourself into the emotional place of Ezekiel. This is you and God, looking at the wreckage of your whole reason for living. And God says to us, “No matter how dry and dead are the bones and ashes of your dreams, I can resurrect them.” God stands beside us in the wreckage of our dearest hopes, and He promises that He can restore it all:   

Then he said to me, "Prophesy to these bones and say to them, 'Dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!’”  And as I was prophesying, there was a noise, a rattling sound, and the bones came together, bone to bone.  I looked, and tendons and flesh appeared on [the bones] and skin covered them, but there was no breath in them. 

God restores the fragments of our lives until they are whole again. Amazing! Can you feel the hugeness of this vision down in your bones? But still, there is no life in them.

Then he said to me, "Prophesy to the breath; prophesy, mortal, and say to it, 'This is what the Sovereign Lord says: Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe into these slain, that they may live.'"  So I prophesied as he commanded me, and breath entered them; they came to life and stood up on their feet—a vast army.

Breath. The breath of God. This is inspiration—to breathe in the Holy Spirit—to be in-spired by the Holy Spirit. Sometimes we need mouth-to-mouth resuscitation from God in order for our hopes and dreams to live again, in order to live, really live again in a life of joy and grace and rich faith. So God provides that too. It is a miracle surpassing all miracles. New life where there was only death.

Our reading from Swedenborg describes bone as truth before it is lived. But that is describing bone that is not attached to or an integral part of a living body. We do have living bones—living bones that ensure we stand upright, have the strength to hold our children and each other, and to withstand outside pressures. God wants our bones to live—and they can, with God’s help, with God’s breath. 

In this story, these are not bones that have never lived, these are bones that were alive once and have died. There is something so much more desperate about that image. We all know these skeletons of things we once loved—they are dreams we had once, relationships that thrived once, ideas and organizations that we trusted in once. How sad it is to stand there with Ezekiel and feel the desperate losses in these bones.

There is so much more to this story.  There is meaning in “the four winds,” and in the skeletons “standing on their feet.” But I need to wrap this up.

This strange story is about despair, but even more it is about hope. It is about hope against hope. It is about God being able to handle things, even when we have lost everything, our faith, our hope, our reason for living, even our belief in God. This story speaks hope into our darkest temptations and breathes new life, and new spirit into us, that we might live again. God revivifies the best of everything that we think we have lost. This story is telling us that we will again see every good thing that we have loved live again one day, because what is made of love never dies, it just hides and goes to sleep for a while. This can be impossible to believe sometimes, and that is okay. It can be impossible to look at three feet of snow on hard frozen ground and believe in soft earth and bare feet in warm grass too. We must await the warm breath of spring the way the bones awaited the breath of life. So, as we head into these last seven weeks of winter, let us live in this metaphor—let us remember this hope against hope, and go gently with each other until new life springs again fresh from the frozen earth.  Amen.

Originally “Them Dry Bones” preached Feb 9^th 2008 St James Lutheran in New Dundee Ontario

The Readings:

Apocalypse Explained 555:14 

“Bone” symbolizes truth before it is made living, that is, incorporated into how we live—this means every single thing we have learned but do not yet use. 

Ezekiel 37:1-14

The hand of the Lord came upon me and brought me out in the Spirit of the Lord, and set me down in the midst of the valley; and it was full of bones. Then He caused me to pass by them all around, and behold, there were very many in the open valley; and indeed they were very dry.  

And He said to me, “Son of man, can these bones live?”

So I answered, “O Lord God, You alone know.”

Again He said to me, “Prophesy to these bones, and say to them, ‘O dry bones, hear the word of the Lord!  Thus says the Lord God to these bones: “Surely I will cause breath to enter into you, and you shall live.  I will put sinews on you and bring flesh upon you, cover you with skin and put breath in you; and you shall live. Then you shall know that I am the Lord.”’”

So I prophesied as I was commanded; and as I prophesied, there was a noise, and suddenly a rattling; and the bones came together, bone to bone.  Indeed, as I looked, the sinews and the flesh came upon them, and the skin covered them over; but there was no breath in them.

Also He said to me, “Prophesy to the breath, prophesy, son of man, and say to the breath, ‘thus says the Lord God: “Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe on these slain, that they may live.”’” So I prophesied as He commanded me, and breath came into them, and they lived, and stood upon their feet, an exceedingly great army.

Then He said to me, “Son of man, these bones are the whole house of Israel. They indeed say, ‘Our bones are dry, our hope is lost, and we ourselves are cut off!’  Therefore prophesy and say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God: “Behold, O My people, I will open your graves and cause you to come up from your graves, and bring you into the land of Israel.  Then you shall know that I am the Lord, when I have opened your graves, O My people, and brought you up from your graves.  I will put My Spirit in you, and you shall live, and I will place you in your own land. Then you shall know that I, the Lord, have spoken it and performed it,” says the Lord.’”

John 11: 1, 3-5, 14-15, 20-23, 25-27, 32, 34-35, 39, 41, 43-44

Now a certain man was sick, Lazarus of Bethany, therefore the sisters sent to Him, saying, “Lord, behold, he whom You love is sick.”

When Jesus heard that, He said, “This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God may be glorified through it.”

Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.  Yet, when He heard that he was sick, He stayed two more days in the place where He was. 

Then Jesus said to them plainly, “Lazarus is dead. And I am glad for your sakes that I was not there, that you may believe. Nevertheless let us go to him.”

Now Martha, as soon as she heard that Jesus was coming, went and met Him, but Mary was sitting in the house. Now Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.  But even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You.”

Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again. … I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live. And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?”

She said to Him, “Yes, Lord, I believe that You are the Christ, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.”

Then, when Mary came where Jesus was, and saw Him, she fell down at His feet, saying to Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.”

And He said, “Where have you laid him?”

They said to Him, “Lord, come and see.”

Jesus wept. Jesus said, “Take away the stone.”

Martha, the sister of him who was dead, said to Him, “Lord, by this time there is a stench, for he has been dead four days.”

Then they took away the stone from the place where the dead man was lying. And Jesus lifted up His eyes and said, “Father, I thank You that You have heard Me.”  Now when He had said these things, He cried with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come forth!” And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with grave clothes, and his face was wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Loose him, and let him go.”

Is Love Alive? - a sermon for second Advent

Is Love Alive?

Sermon for the Advent of Love

Rev. Alison Longstaff, Dec 7, 2014

Bath Church of the New Jerusalem

Luke 1: 26-38, Matthew 1:18-25, Selections from Heavenly Secrets 1820:2

There is a bit of dark humor that really appeals to me.  And as it applies to today’s topic I will share it with you now. It goes like this:

“We are born naked, wet, and hungry.  Then things get worse.”

So, today I want to talk about the vulnerability of love, and just how vulnerable God was willing to become to deliver His message of love.  He didn’t show his love by being the mightiest, or having the biggest guns, or the most money, or the best Homeland security, but by being the most vulnerable.  He allowed himself to be tortured and murdered to show us in the most palpable way imaginable that love transcends even unjust arrest, torture, and death.  He chose to be vulnerable.  His strength was illustrated by his “weakness”.

So as we are celebrating His birth, with joy and gifts and lights and hope, can we remember what He chose?  How will it all end?  Will LOVE live?

Raise your hand if you have ever heard of a “Blue” Christmas service.

 

A “Blue” Christmas service is one that makes a space for those whose pain and loss during this “most wonderful time of the year” is too great for them to be able to join in the festivities.  When most of the rest of us are wishing each other “Merry Christmas!” or “Happy Hanu-Solsti-Bodhi-Kwaanza-kkuh!” a Blue Christmas service carves out a safe and sacred space for those who need to be with the truth of their emotional reality—sadness, sorrow, loss, homesickness, pain, separation, or bereavement.  It is a gentle, quiet space, not even pretending that everyone should be joyful.

Somehow, loss, separation, disruption, and bereavement are more sharply outlined during the holidays when all those around us seem to be celebrating.  One woman confessed to me recently, “Why does everyone have to tell me to have a Happy Thanksgiving?  It’s not a happy thanksgiving.  My mother died and we aren't celebrating at all.”  In her pain she heard, “Happy Thanksgiving” as a command, and it sharpened her sense of grief.  It is not uncommon for raw loss to come out as anger or bitterness.  And unless we have been trained to deal with such loss when we encounter it, we are likely to feel uncomfortable or guilty or maybe even judgmental of the one who is voicing such hurt and pain during the holidays.

My hope is that today’s message will open our awareness to include with compassion and comfort all the experiences of this holiday season—the joyful and sorrowful, the bright and the bitter, the sweet and the sharp—believing that somehow they are united by love and remembering that love makes a space for all sides of us. 

Suffering need not diminish the sparkling joy; nor does any delight and pleasure need to invalidate the sorrow.  They can live side by side in this season, but it may take intentionality to learn how to be comfortable with all of it.  Sometimes the joy and pleasure will be contagious and brighten the days of the sorrowful.  At other times the suffering is so acute that the surrounding joy must show respect in quietness, holding those suffering in love and patience.

According to Swedenborg, we are what we love.  Love is what drives us and motivates us and inspires us.  And love is what hurts most acutely when attacked. 

We love, and we love deeply.  Our greatest joy is when people we love are doing well, and when we hear news of new love and new life.  The toughest times are when something we love is threatened, or is suffering, or has been lost. 

Joy and love open us up.  Pain and fear shut us down.  Do you see the relationship?

To guard what is most precious to us, we build defenses around it.  We don’t want the things we treasure most to be hurt or threatened in any way.  Some defenses are reasonable and prudent. But sometimes, if we have been hurt deeply, we build bigger and bigger defenses, hiding from more and more of life, swearing we will not be hurt that way again.  It makes sense that we do this, but building stronger and stronger defenses will not serve us in the long run.  Because defenses, while protecting the things we love, also block love’s movement and expression, like a princess walled up in a tower to keep her safe; or like a light hidden under a bucket.  One’s defense mechanisms themselves can end doing more harm than good.

So let’s look at how today’s scripture selections speak to love and defensiveness and vulnerability.

In our first Scripture reading, we see Mary hearing the news that she would become the mother of God.  This promise was actually inviting Mary into tremendous vulnerability.  A woman when pregnant is far more vulnerable than she is ordinarily.  To be an unmarried pregnant woman in that culture was one of the worst fates Mary could face.  During labor she would be reduced to complete dependency on those around her for her life and the life of her baby.  Yet Mary essentially said, “So be it,” to all of it, even though her pregnancy could mean Joseph’s rejection. Mary said, “Yes,” even though she could be left alone with an infant and no means or support. Granted, she had an angel reassuring her, but still, Mary’s trust here is remarkable.

Then we see Joseph being asked to accept Mary even though she was pregnant. Joseph clearly wasn’t happy with Mary’s news, because he took at least overnight, and possibly longer to decide how to respond.  In fact, we read that Joseph had pretty much decided to cut Mary off “quietly” until the angel intervened. The Joseph side of our nature is like that.  It nearly says “no” to God’s birth into our lives because it is more cautious.  Joseph was afraid, or the angel would not have said, “Do not be afraid to take Mary to wife.”

But with the angel’s promptings, Joseph did eventually say “yes” to the care of Mary and thus to the birth of this Divine child into his life. 

In Swedenborgian theology, there are two sides to each of us, rather like the two hemispheres of our brain.  There is the open, connecting, creative, optimistic, inclusive side of us (or our right-brain side); and there is the protective, analytical, sorting, boxing and prioritizing side, (or our left-brain side).  Mary shows up here as our right-brain response to God’s advent into our lives.  She is the part of us ready to accept and gestate this Divine in-breaking with very few questions. That part of us simply says “yes” right away. 

Joseph is representing our left-brain energy.  His role will be to protect and provide for this child that is not his own.  He is hesitant and skeptical; he takes time to discern the risks and benefits. He nearly says no, before an angel speaks in his dreams and turns him around. 

When I think of these two energies and all the ways they show up in my life, one example that makes me smile is this church’s board, and the lovely mix of dreamers and money-crunchers, optimists and … well, the hesitant and careful.  We need both energies. One isn't better than the other any more than the left hemisphere is better than the right in our brains. To function at our best we need a healthy marriage between them, in our personal inner lives, and in our communities, and on every church board.  In every aspect of life we get onto trouble when the dreamers charge ahead without the consent of the careful, or when the careful stonewall every dream because of risk-aversion.  The two sides must work together as a team, trusting the wisdom inherent in each; and most of all, as in the story of Mary and Joseph, needing to remember that it is God’s direction and guidance that will accomplish the plan not their own dreams or prudence.  Neither Mary nor Joseph alone could have been able to birth, catch, hold, clean, swaddle and nurse this Divine expression of Love at his most wet and squirmy and vulnerable.

Love makes us vulnerable.  And loving someone small and defenseless who is relying on us for safety and survival makes us the most vulnerable of all.  

Our reading from Swedenborg says that evil attacks what we love most. Herod went after every single baby and toddler for miles around.  Our softness, our tenderness, our openness—these things are seen as a threat in a macho culture.  When we are all about our own ability not to get hurt, or to be the strongest, or to be “invulnerable,” anything seen as “weak” is anathema.  Everything is viewed in threat and risk terms, and everything that can make us vulnerable is the thing to be guarded against above all. 

That was not Jesus’ message nor his model. 

While it is a normal human response to react to pain and injury by throwing up defensive walls, defensive walls stop the flow of love.  They leave no room at the inn.  They create a space to hide, and hiding is not what we were brought here to do.

The experiences of sorrow and loss around this holiday are experiences of love too.  They express great love, or we would not hurt so much.  While the pain and loss can make us wonder if we will ever feel joy again, the answer lies in the pain itself.  The love is alive or there would be no pain.  It truly is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.  And where there is love, there is God. And where there is God, all things are possible.

So if you are feeling naked, wet, and hungry, and like things are just going to get worse, remember: Love has a way of accomplishing what it sets out to do.  It holds back nothing from those it loves. True vulnerability is the bravest and strongest part of us, no matter how things look, because it is willing to go into and through the darkness, trusting in the new dawn.

So this Christmas, let us try to say “Yes” to the birth of vulnerability in our own lives however that shows up for us.  When an angel asks us to take a risk for love, will we dare to say “yes” and trust that God has a plan?  Mostly, will we heed the call of love, and be brave enough to face the darkness even with all the feelings of vulnerability and pain?  Because that is the path love takes and the way to new life.  Amen

The following was the interlude:

Winter Song,By Sara Bareilles and Ingrid Michaelson

Bum bum bum bum, bum bum bum bum
Bum bum, bum bum bum bum
Bum bum, bum bum bum bum

This is my winter song to you
The storm is coming soon
It rolls in from the sea

My voice, a beacon in the night
My words will be your light
To carry you to me

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love (pause)

They say that things just cannot grow
Beneath the winter snow
Or so I have been told

They say we're buried far
Just like a distant star
I simply cannot hold

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?

This is my winter song
December never felt so wrong
Cause you're not where you belong
Inside my arms

Bum bum bum bum, bum bum bum bum
Bum bum, bum bum bum bum
Bum bum, bum bum bum bum

I still believe in summer days
The seasons always change
And life will find a way

I'll be your harvester of light
And send it out tonight
So we can start again

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?

This is my winter song
December never felt so wrong
Cause you're not where you belong
Inside my arms

This is my winter song to you
The storm is coming soon
It rolls in from the sea

My love a beacon in the night
My words will be your light
To carry you to me

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?

The Readings

Luke 1: 26-38  Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth,  to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin’s name was Mary.  And having come in, the angel said to her, “Rejoice, highly favored one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!”

 But when she saw him, she was troubled at his saying, and considered what manner of greeting this was.  Then the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God.  And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bring forth a Son, and shall call His name Jesus.  He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Highest; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David.  And He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of His kingdom there will be no end.”

Then Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I do not know a man?”

And the angel answered and said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Highest will overshadow you; therefore, also, that Holy One who is to be born will be called the Son of God.  Now indeed, Elizabeth your relative has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is now the sixth month for her who was called barren.  For with God nothing will be impossible.”

Then Mary said, “Behold the maidservant of the Lord! Let it be to me according to your word.” And the angel departed from her.

Matthew 1: 18-25  Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit.  Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly.  But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.  She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.”  All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: “Behold, a virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means, “God is with us.”  When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife, but had no marital relations with her until she had borne a son; and he named him Jesus.

Heavenly Secrets 1820:2, 5 portions

Since few people know what temptations really are, let a brief explanation of them be given here. Evil spirits only attack what someone loves, and the more intensely we love, the more fiercely do those spirits attack us. By attacking what we love most deeply, they attack every single thing about us, since each person’s very life consists in what we love. Nothing gives evil spirits more delight than to destroy someone; and they would attack what we love relentlessly if the Lord did not drive them away.

“Teach Me to Pray”

Rev. Alison Longstaff, May 18, 2014

Bath Church of the New Jerusalem

Genesis 24: 42-48, 25: 20-21; Mark 10:46-52; HS 2535

Note:  I struggled with the pronouns in this sermon.  Sometimes I use “you” and sometimes “we.”  “We” includes everyone, communicating that we are not alone in these struggles and experiences—that we all deal with them.  But sometimes the situations I am describing are just too specific, and sounded very weird in my ears unless I went to a more singular “you.”  So just know that when I am using “you,” I am not up here pointing a finger down on YOU personally.  “You” simply worked better than “one” or “we.”

In our Scripture readings today we see three examples of prayer, not just of prayer, but of prayer answered completely and miraculously.  Prayer answered completely and miraculously.  Wouldn't that be nice?  How many of you, when you pray, expect your prayers to be answered that way?

In the first story, the servant of Abraham (we aren't told his name) asks for a very specific sign to indicate God’s choice of a wife for Isaac—and he gets it, loud and clear, with all sorts of amazing side details he never imagined.  In the second story, a blind man—Bartimaeus—beseeches Jesus to heal him, despite admonitions from the crowd to be quiet.  The more they shushed him, the louder he cried, until Jesus called him to come over.  Jesus grants Bartimaeus his prayer and heals his blindness.  Just like that.

So, today I want to talk about our prayer lives—yours and mine.  I want to explore why we do and do not pray, what we expect when we pray, who we pray to, and how we deal with disappointment when our prayers seem to go unanswered.

Swedenborg tells us that prayer is speech with God.  It is important then to explore how we actually picture God, not what we say we believe about God, because this directly affects how we talk to God.

What happens if you picture the Lord, (as is the truth) as your best friend?  What if God is right here, right now, next to you, enjoying being with you?  What if God knows everything about you and yet still loves you dearly, just like a best friend?  (As if God would stop loving us if “He” knew our uglier sides.  What part of “omnipresent” says God misses some details of our life?)

When you relax into a heart-friendship with the Lord, you discover that God is exactly that close and that loving.  The Lord is more comfortable and safe than any best friend.  There is no need to fear, because there is nothing to fear. 

So, how would you talk to a best-friend God?  With a best-friend God, prayer really does become conversation.  Have you seen the character Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof, talking to God all the time, about everything?  We can be like that too, discussing everything, our car that won’t start, our sick child, that pain in our right shoulder, our son-in-law that needs another job. Nothing is too big or too small to share.  Everything is on the table. 

The Lord wants us to be that open and comfortable with Him.  Jesus came so that He might show us that He is with us right here.  That’s what “Emmanuel” means: “God WITH us;” Right here, right now. Beside you. Surrounding you. Holding your hand, holding you up, laughing with you, crying with you, watching you when you rest, and cheering you on when you try something new.

Why wouldn't we share everything with our best friend?

There are many things that can get in the way of a healthy prayer life.  We may have been taught incorrect things about prayer, making us afraid to pray in case we do it “wrong.”  We may have some incorrect ideas about God.  Perhaps we think God doesn't care, or that prayer doesn't work.  Maybe we don’t even know what prayer is for.

Most of us, at some point, have tried prayer and had it fail. We might have asked for something as mundane as a certain toy for Christmas, or something as heart-wrenching as a dear friend surviving cancer.  When our prayers go unanswered we can feel abandoned and betrayed by God. Depending on the depth of the loss, that sense of betrayal can turn into a lot of anger—a sort of spiritual temper tantrum.  Anger at God and a refusal even to speak to God, especially after an untimely death is very common.  Is that where you are? 

The interesting thing is, we can be completely mad at God and completely desperate for God’s love at the same time.  Like a child in a tantrum, we can rage at and reject God, yet deeply rely on God’s continued love.  It is hard to wrap our brains around.  We can believe in God and not believe in God at the same time.  As one friend said to me during a rough time, “I don’t know if I even believe in God anymore.” She then finished with a wry grin, “But at least I know God will forgive me for doubting.”

Anyway, if you struggle to believe, don’t judge yourself, you are in good company—Mother Teresa did too, did you know that?  She struggled terribly sometimes.  Doubt and feelings of abandonment and anger at God are all signs of spiritual work.  Doubt and anger are also some of the bigger reasons we might stop talking to God.

We have covered who we pray to, and why we might not pray, and a little about what we expect when we pray.  What about how we pray?

There are many ways to pray: silently in our hearts, openly, speaking out loud, in song, with tears—I have even seen how yoga can serve as body prayer.  We can be meek and mild.  Or we can be like Bartimaeus who cried out and shouted for what he wanted.  (I have done that. Er, in the privacy of my home….) Bartimaeus begged for what he wanted. When everyone around him told him to be quiet—there are plenty of naysayers in life, aren’t there?—he just cried louder and louder until Jesus heard him.  Jesus always heard him, but He allowed Bartimaeus to persist in asking—in pleading—for what he wanted so that Bartimaeus would be completely prepared when his dream came true.

The story of Bartimaeus illustrates the relationship between our side of prayer and God’s side of prayer.  Sometimes we have to ask very loud and for a long time for what we want.  When this is true, it doesn't mean we are doing something wrong.  When we have to wait for an answer, it is God preparing things behind the scenes.  Think of it rather like a four-year-old praying to fly a jet-plane.  God’s answer may be “yes!” but it will still take a long time of growth and learning and development and training before that four-year-old sees that dream realized. That is nobody’s fault.  No one is wrong.  But to the four-year-old, it will look like there’s no answer to that prayer for a loooong time. 

Our job is to pray, beg, SHOUT for what we want; then do everything we can; and then TRUST. We must “pray to catch the bus”, and then “run as fast as we can”; AND we must trust there will be another bus if we miss the one we wanted.  Pray, pursue, let go. God has the much bigger job—arranging things behind the scenes—and we must trust that He is doing his part.

Do you talk to God regularly?  Just like Tevye?  Why or why not?

Well, here’s my next question for you: What if you really did ask for your heart’s desire?  And what if God said “yes?”

I think sometimes the thought of having our dreams come true is far scarier than simply accepting the spiritual scraps we find under the master’s table. 

I was part of a community once that was praying to grow.  They were doing all the right things, setting their intention, working to welcome new people, applying for grants, running fundraisers and working very hard.  Does that sound familiar?  And their efforts started to pay off!  The money came pouring in—more than they had asked for.  New members were coming and staying.  This little congregation was getting what they prayed for.  It was a beautiful time for them.

Unfortunately, as often happens in these stories, the success must have unnerved too many of them.  And for whatever reason, the leadership couldn’t stop the internal sabotage. The positive excitement became fear and manipulation. Squabbling, gossip, and politics took over. Most of the new people trickled away.  Within two years, lack of support or follow-through on the good initiatives reduced the congregation inevitably back to what they had always been—the same tiny group and not enough money. I wouldn’t have believed it if I hadn’t seen it.  We are all capable of this sort of choice.  There is a part in each of us that would rather choose the struggle we know over the scary momentum of success.  While we always have the choice to keep moving forward, sometimes we allow fear to sabotage our efforts.  Success can be really scary.

I can only urge each of us: when God answers a prayer, try to accept the gift and say thank you; rather than running and hiding.

When we, all of us together, set our sights on a dream, and with conviction and determination fight to make it happen, the universe (meaning God) has a crazy way of responding in abundance.  The cup has a tendency to overflow, in fact.  It is one way God works miracles.  It can be kinda scary, but stay with it.  Why miss the ride of your life?

And when your prayer gets answered, stop and pay attention to that.  Notice and remember—put a bookmark in the memory—write it on your heart that God answers prayers.  It is so easy to sink into discouragement and cynicism, especially when things are not going well.  God always answers prayers, but not always with speed. However, every good thing that we ask for we will receive in time, especially when we follow our prayer with committed action.  Miracles can and do happen, despite all the naysayers. 

There is a famous quote by William H. Murray that goes: “The moment one definitively commits oneself, then providence moves too.  All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.  A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no one would have dreamt would have come their  way.”

Where would Bartimaeus be if he had listened to the naysayers and given up?  

So next time you sit down for a chat with your Best Friend, fasten your seatbelt and prepare for the ride of your life.

Radically revised from a sermon preached October 25, 2009, in Kitchener, Ontario

 Readings:

Genesis 24: 42-48, 25: 20-21  “And this day I came to the well and said, ‘O Lord God of my master Abraham, if You will now prosper the way in which I go, 43 behold, I stand by the well of water; and it shall come to pass that when the virgin comes out to draw water, and I say to her, “Please give me a little water from your pitcher to drink,” 44 and she says to me, “Drink, and I will draw for your camels also,”—let her be the woman whom the Lord has appointed for my master’s son.’

45 “But before I had finished speaking in my heart, there was Rebekah, coming out with her pitcher on her shoulder; and she went down to the well and drew water. And I said to her, ‘Please let me drink.’46 And she made haste and let her pitcher down from her shoulder, and said, ‘Drink, and I will give your camels a drink also.’ So I drank, and she gave the camels a drink also. 47 Then I asked her, and said, ‘Whose daughter are you?’ And she said, ‘The daughter of Bethuel, Nahor’s son, whom Milcah bore to him.’ So I put the nose ring on her nose and the bracelets on her wrists. 48 And I bowed my head and worshiped the Lord, and blessed the Lord God of my master Abraham, who had led me in the way of truth to take the daughter of my master’s brother for his son.

25: 20 Isaac was forty years old when he took Rebekah as wife, the daughter of Bethuel the Syrian of Padan Aram, the sister of Laban the Syrian. 21 Now Isaac pleaded with the Lord for his wife, because she was barren; and the Lord granted his plea, and Rebekah his wife conceived.

Mark 10:46-52

46 Now they came to Jericho. As He went out of Jericho with His disciples and a great multitude, blind Bartimaeus, the son of Timaeus, sat by the road begging. 47 And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out and say, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”  48 Then many warned him to be quiet; but he cried out all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”  49 So Jesus stood still and commanded him to be called.  Then they called the blind man, saying to him, “Be of good cheer. Rise, He is calling you.”  50 And throwing aside his garment, he rose and came to Jesus.  51 So Jesus answered and said to him, “What do you want Me to do for you?”  The blind man said to Him, “Rabboni, that I may receive my sight.”

52 Then Jesus said to him, “Go your way; your faith has made you well.” And immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus on the road.

Heavenly Secrets #2535 Prayer, regarded in itself, is speech with God.  It involves a concentration on the topic of the prayer.  Then something flows into our perception or thought in answer, such that there is a certain opening of our interiors toward God.  This is different from person to person, according our circumstances, and according to the quality and the reason for our prayer. If we pray in loving-kindness and in trust, and for heavenly and spiritual things, then we receive something like a revelation (which is manifested in our feelings) bringing hope, consolation, and a certain inward joy. - Emanuel Swedenborg